From ‘Mood Hoovers’ - Uncover the Reasons Pessimistic Companions Can Benefit You Personally
Myself crave insights from people about handling middle-aged struggles, for example deep inner questions, diminishing importance, developing a neck akin to a surrealist painting plus a fresh interest for A Place in the Sun. Lately, I read his remarks about hitting fifty via a discussion: “Trimming unnecessary clutter is key to enjoying your later years,” he noted. “Surround yourself with uplifting friends. I’m dodging pessimists – ‘fun sponges’ – and improving at refusing requests.”
Initially, I wondered: isn’t this contradictory about evading pessimists and honing one’s rejection skills? Doesn’t that mean he has to avoid himself? I realize – that’s typical energy vampire talk, and I admit I fit the description. Although in our community we actually prefer the expression “energy vampire”. Steer clear of labels like “killjoy” or “buzzkill” – equating us to mundane objects hurts; we do experience emotions (even if they’re mostly bleak). In a bind, I might tolerate “melancholy luxury blanket”.
It’s possible you’re also a member. Do you tend to be the event’s realist rather than its cheerleader? When you give an exhaustive answer to “How are you?”, does the other person slowly retreat? Upon hearing “exciting” ideas, do you make a face as if you’ve tasted something vile? Can you relate deeply to pessimistic characters; has an intuitive ever described your energy as dull?
If so, you’re one of us, but it’s OK. Even as popular advice encourages cutting ties with “exhausting” pals, I believe we provide genuine benefits. It’s likely an energy vampire would have expressed doubts – or shown a grimace – upon hearing about the planned book with a First Nations lead done without input, possibly avoiding much trouble, distress, and disrespect. You don’t get that sort of service from “lovely people”.
